It's finally done

Karlee finally got married to Alex and all I can say is FINALLY! I remember when they first met and their first kiss and their dramatic arguments (that still go on today) and all that waiting for the other crap when Alex left on his mission. We all worked hard to push them through so they are finally together forever.
Well enough of that, Brian and I had a good time running around playing in Sheridan but we're happy to get home. Cause we can't stand sleeping on another waterbed, air mattress or the ground again. Our backs have slowly become crippled as we've slept on these different assortments or what people call "beds". Who the crap thought of these mattresses? Hey, lets go sleep on a plastic bag filled with water! Hey, lets go sleep on a plastic bag filled with air! They won't be too bad for our backs. We'll make enough money on these stupid mattresses that we can pay other people to fix our backs, screw the middle and lower class people. And the floor, isn't that what abused kids sleep on? I thought my parents actually liked me better than a red-headed step-child. I felt like Harry Potter at his horrible aunt's and uncle's.
Well the floor helps the back, I didn't sleep on the floor, Brian did and he quite enjoyed it. The only mistreatment we had was at the hotel we stayed at in Billings by the receptionist in the evening.
Anywho, moving on... guess what happened to Brian and I? Yeah you won't guess, you'll just keep reading. So at the start of our marriage, before I had Brian on a shorter leash, he went out and bought a projector. Not the little sleek nice ones. He bought Big Bertha. She weighs two-hundred pounds and is bigger than your average four-year-old child. If Big Bertha was a real kid I'd show her on as many tacky talk shows they have, including Operah . The fact is, Big Bertha, isn't alive but we still can't get rid of her. Brian grew sick of her and posted all the details of her largeness on some online classified add. We've had many come by and look at the freaky largeness of Bertha but so far no takers. Our favorite visiters were from Guatemala. They had a little car and were planning on loading it up and driving all the way back home... to Guatemala. We advised them not to because it was just plan strange and stupid. They called back and they got a bigger car so we might sell it to them because thats a step up from strange and stupid. It's now just plan strange. We'll give you details as events warrant.
Love you all... Daladna (russian for whatever).